Malkav
Life sucks, it's really hard most of the time - it's the little things you've just gotta go out and enjoy ?
I recently went through a great (sarcasm) break up with the girl I had been with for 3 years, I sunk into a lovely little hole for a week or two but now I just find solace in all the amazing things that this world has to offer ? I don't know much about where you live, but down here in Cape Town we have beaches and mountains and nature reserves and stuff - me and a friend have been making it our personal mission to go to all of these beautiful places with acoustics and just jam ? it's been an incredibly enriching experience and it kinda helped to ground me again after all this shit that's just happened.
Music is your lifestyle and through out any emotional scenario in your life it'll be there, it's the true language of the human soul - but music is about communication, it's worthless if you've got this gift that you just hide in your bedroom. Take the initiative to get involved with the people on this forum and go jam - you'll meet new people and you'll grow as a musician which is pretty much the only goal you should have in mind ? Go watch other bands play, you don't need to know anyone. It may be lame being that guy in the corner that doesn't know anyone but after you've taken the initiative to be somewhere 2 or 3 times people will come and talk to you ? especially with the metalheads in S.A cause as BRUTAL as their outside appearance may be, about 85% of them are probably really warm, friendly people ?
The real trick is to just break the habit of focusing on all the negative things in life, and it's a hard habit to break once you're in it. It takes time to build a new perspective on life, but when you do you'll be happier and people will gravitate towards you because they'll be able to sense that ? As for the girls, well no girl wants to date a sad sack, just focus on getting yourself happy and I'm sure someone amazing will come along and will want to be a part of this new life of yours ?
It may sound a bit strange but if you can try and make a few really good female friends, not to try and date or get anywhere with, but with guys there seems to be quite a taboo on opening up or exposing your weaker points and a good female friend can offer new perspective and will often be willing to talk to you about any of the tough times you're going through ?
One of my closest friends is like a 2nd mom to me (she's about the same age as my mom) and after everything that happened I went to go and sit down and talk with her over some coffee, her wisdom and warmth helped me to realise many things and put me in a far more positive place ? I don't know if anyone else has this kind of experience but I've just generally found that in certain aspects of life females can be "truer" friends than guys sometimes ?
Just roll with the punches and make the most out of everyday ? and get that driver's license sorted out, the freedom it'll give you is worth every moment of schlep that it will be. Nothing beats coming home and deciding you'd like to go out for the night and having that freedom to just pick up and go ?
