How true for you is this stereotype?

Bob-Dubery

Why is it that all men insist on having a music library full of Simon & Garfunkel, The Smiths, and other such downbeat artists? And why do they feel the need to educate you in the ways of said downbeat artists, as if you have only ever listened to nursery rhymes before?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/7881356/Bryony-Gordon-on-sad-boys-music.html

Bob-Dubery

The counter-argument being

Why is it that all girls only listen to Lady Gaga, Girls Aloud, Madonna and Westlife?

singemonkey

The difference she's describing, imo, is the difference between people who take music seriously, and people who don't. I'm guessing that her life has been arranged in such a way that the majority of her women friends happen to see music as backround sound for a boring day at the office or in the commute, and most of her male friends are serious about it. So she has come to an incorrect conclusion, I'm guessing.

Because the division is false - downbeat music = smiths, S&G, upbeat = lady gaga. The truth is that downbeat music = smiths, S&G, and upbeat music = The Beatles, AC/DC. She's saying downbeat = good musicians, upbeat = pop trash. Only someone who doesn't take music seriously would see it like that.

My girlfriend admits that she's not much into music, and the Backstreet Boys are a favourite. She likes a few other things as well and a lot of individual songs. But fave bands bring up things like that. It's not because she's a woman. It's because she doesn't take music very seriously. My women friends who do take music seriously listen to a lot of downbeat, and upbeat music by artists expressing themselves.

chris77

+1 to what Singe said. A better question would be why are more men than woman serious about music? Adolescent development maybe? There are exceptions offcourse. One of my cousins has a very infectuous passion for British indie music (that I doubt she shares with her lady friends) Mostly though when music is the topic, its the fellas doing the talking. Well, in my circles anyway.

infernox

Plain and simple thats the old argument of why men play Air Guitar and women Air Sing/Dance...

Mens Health had a long article about this quite a few years ago.

NorioDS

I hardly think it's a gender thing. Many of the women I know are very serious about their music. And many of the men I know aren't. Personally, I think it differs from person to person. To write it all up to gender is naive at best.

Warren

Norio wrote I hardly think it's a gender thing. Many of the women I know are very serious about their music. And many of the men I know aren't. Personally, I think it differs from person to person. To write it all up to gender is naive at best.

++;

I don't think you can generalise based on gender.

My little girl loves her Lady Gaga album, but when she gets in my car she demands Santana and Queen. I think that the more eclectic, the better. After all, you can't get down to "Sounds of Silence" like you can to "Poker Face" ?

Jericho

singemonkey wrote The difference she's describing, imo, is the difference between people who take music seriously, and people who don't. I'm guessing that her life has been arranged in such a way that the majority of her women friends happen to see music as backround sound for a boring day at the office or in the commute, and most of her male friends are serious about it. So she has come to an incorrect conclusion, I'm guessing.

Because the division is false - downbeat music = smiths, S&G, upbeat = lady gaga. The truth is that downbeat music = smiths, S&G, and upbeat music = The Beatles, AC/DC. She's saying downbeat = good musicians, upbeat = pop trash. Only someone who doesn't take music seriously would see it like that.

My girlfriend admits that she's not much into music, and the Backstreet Boys are a favourite. She likes a few other things as well and a lot of individual songs. But fave bands bring up things like that. It's not because she's a woman. It's because she doesn't take music very seriously. My women friends who do take music seriously listen to a lot of downbeat, and upbeat music by artists expressing themselves.

This.

I find lots of women bring musical discussions to how hot the people being discussed are. ?

My ex woman claimed she doesn't much care for the "words" in a song...I told her, you're like a lot of singers then!

[deleted]

Jericho wrote
singemonkey wrote The difference she's describing, imo, is the difference between people who take music seriously, and people who don't. I'm guessing that her life has been arranged in such a way that the majority of her women friends happen to see music as backround sound for a boring day at the office or in the commute, and most of her male friends are serious about it. So she has come to an incorrect conclusion, I'm guessing.

Because the division is false - downbeat music = smiths, S&G, upbeat = lady gaga. The truth is that downbeat music = smiths, S&G, and upbeat music = The Beatles, AC/DC. She's saying downbeat = good musicians, upbeat = pop trash. Only someone who doesn't take music seriously would see it like that.

My girlfriend admits that she's not much into music, and the Backstreet Boys are a favourite. She likes a few other things as well and a lot of individual songs. But fave bands bring up things like that. It's not because she's a woman. It's because she doesn't take music very seriously. My women friends who do take music seriously listen to a lot of downbeat, and upbeat music by artists expressing themselves.
This.

I find lots of women bring musical discussions to how hot the people being discussed are. ?

My ex woman claimed she doesn't much care for the "words" in a song...I told her, you're like a lot of singers then!

More power to Norio's argument, then: nearly all the women I've been with have focused almost entirely on the lyrics, while I'm always focused on the music. Hahahahaha

Squonk

Quite a good topic, because it would seem as most men take music more seriously, but I dont think that is the case.

My wife is one of those people who generally appreciates anything mainstream, Celine Dion, Westlife, Snow Patrol, Coldplay etc.
I think she likes to be comfortable with the stuff she listens to, bring in distortion and and notes that are not melodic etc. it becomes a bit jarring for her.

But she does love the music that she likes, I know because I have to stand in the Queue and be slightly embarrassed buying it for her.
She has the same taste with the Cinema as well, she loves the mainstream stuff, Romantic Comedies, Thrillers etc, but battles with the non hollywood type cinema.

I think most people fit into this bracket, men or women!

Bob-Dubery

Norio wrote I hardly think it's a gender thing. Many of the women I know are very serious about their music. And many of the men I know aren't. Personally, I think it differs from person to person. To write it all up to gender is naive at best.

But men who aren't serious about their music tend to be not serious about more serious acts. You don't see them buying Westlife albums. Would they be seen dead with a Lady Gaga CD?

I was just struck by this article's relating of how "the socialist" (the male figure) had to explain and justify his choice of music. I've done that. I've seen male friends of mine do that. I don't think I've seen any of my female friends so keen to justify their tastes or explain why serious is better (which may well be about being seen to be serious), even when they are fastidious about the music they listen to.

It's a small sample, but my wife weighs the guitar playing differently than I do when we go to a show. She NOTICES. I didn't have to start explaining her to that Martin Simpson is a fab player and here's why... but she didn't get as worked up by all his balls-to-the-wall slide solos as I did. Thinking of the people that I meet at shows or who I know and who go to the same shows, the guys seems to pay more attention to the guitar playing, to the drumming and so on. They will remark about what a crap guitarist Loudon Wainwright is, it seems to matter less to their significant others (and it shouldn't matter really, if you want guitar solos then what are you doing watching Loudon Wainwright?).

Maybe it's just down to guys and pissing competitions. Who knows the most? Who is more selective? Maybe we think that listening to Steely Dan makes us more attractive to women.

NorioDS

Warren wrote you can't get down to "Sounds of Silence" like you can to "Poker Face" ?

Bahahahaha! Well you can but that's when your family makes a call to the friendly people in white coats ?

Warren

X-rated Bob wrote
Maybe it's just down to guys and pissing competitions. Who knows the most? Who is more selective? Maybe we think that listening to Steely Dan makes us more attractive to women.

Who are Steely Dan?

There may be some truth to what you say, but is it limited to music alone? The guys I know all have bigger and better PCs (or Macs ?), iPhones, 4x4s ('Ag no man, you didn't buy the Jeep did you?'), LCD TVs etc. than the next man-brick in the wall.

Based purely upon my own impressions, women have this competitive streak too but seem to express it differently: they can spot that fake Louis Vuitton bag from a mile away, and can never suppress a smirk when they spot cellulite (even photo-shopped) on a famous actress or singer's butt. They won't laugh at the chick in the queue forking out dosh on Celine Dion, but god help them if their highlights are growing out and the roots are starting to show...

[deleted]

Maybe it's just down to guys and pissing competitions. Who knows the most? Who is more selective? Maybe we think that listening to Steely Dan makes us more attractive to women.

I think there's an element of truth to this. Although obviously everything isn't as black and white as that. My boyfriend is into lots of "hobbies" and him and his friends will go through a craze, learn all the little facts and figures and buy the equipment, like it's fun or something. If I like a song, that's the reward already, I don't need verification.

BMU

X-rated Bob wrote Why is it that all men insist on having a music library full of Simon & Garfunkel, The Smiths, and other such downbeat artists?

Regarding the original question: not very true. I'd slit my wrists if I had to sit through an entire album of any one of those.

Bob-Dubery

Warren wrote
X-rated Bob wrote
Maybe it's just down to guys and pissing competitions. Who knows the most? Who is more selective? Maybe we think that listening to Steely Dan makes us more attractive to women.
Who are Steely Dan?

They are a manufactured group, something like the Monkees, but targetted at a market of nerdy swots who were prepared to part with their pocket money in order to look mysterious and thus, hopefully, attractive to the girls in the gymnastics team (or any other girls). They were thoughtful enough to hire lots of top flight guitarists so that when the 1st rugby team were waxing enthusiastic about Bachman Turner Overdrive or Slade the nerdy swots could play their trump card of asking what they thought about Larry Carlton's solo on "Kid Charlemagne". The trap was laid, and all you had to was wait for some muscle bound lummox to ask "Larry who? and then you had one foot in the now open door of mystery and superior knowledge. There was now a good chance that some girl would want to nurse you after the front row had beaten you into a bloody pulp.

Results were inconclusive.

singemonkey

Well plenty of women are serious about music. Maybe the one's who aren't are more comfortable telling men who are about it than men who aren't would be ( ???). There may be more pressure on men to pretend they care about this stuff. Or maybe there's an element of men feeling that they need to look "deep" to be attractive - and listening exclusively to Roxette doesn't do that. So you get guys who are not interested in music who, as teenagers, attach their image to "dark," and "soulful" musicians. I think my brother was a bit like this. He's one of those people for whom music is really only background. But he was big buyer of all the goth and alternative stuff of the early nineties.

Hey, you know one sure way you know someone doesn't get music? They turn down a song they know you put on without even asking you, or apologising or crapping you out or anything. They just do with as if it's completely fine. Because they can't imagine anyone caring that much. >☹

Bob-Dubery

singemonkey wrote There may be more pressure on men to pretend they care about this stuff. Or maybe there's an element of men feeling that they need to look "deep" to be attractive - and listening exclusively to Roxette doesn't do that. So you get guys who are not interested in music who, as teenagers, attach their image to "dark," and "soulful" musicians. I think my brother was a bit like this. He's one of those people for whom music is really only background. But he was big buyer of all the goth and alternative stuff of the early nineties.

Ja. The burden that men bear. Always having to deck themselves out in all kinds of finery - actual or metaphorical - for the good of the species.

lindsmuse

What's that about Steely Dan? As female I don't get the entire drift (I have an excuse for blotting out large chunks of technical info.)- it's too complicated - were they manufactured or were you being tongue in cheek there Bob?
I liked them a lot. (Still do when the occasion calls for it!)