Keira-WitherKay
here's something one of my students forwarded to me today...just passing it on ................
The Ten Commandments of Jamming
I. Thou shalt not ever forsake the beat.
II. Thou shalt arrange thyselves in a small circle so that thou mayest hear and see the other musicians. Thou shalt listen with thine ears to the songs and attempt to play in accord with the group; also, open thine eyes betimes to look about thee, lest there be some visual sign someone is endeavoring to send thee. Thou shalt play softly when someone lifteth his voice in song, when playing harmony, and when thou knowest not what thou is doing.
III. Thou shalt play in tune. Tune thine instrument well, and tune it often with thine electric tuner, lest the sounds emanating from thine instrument be unclean.
IV. Thou shalt commence and cease playing each tune together as one, so that the noise ye make be a joyful noise, and not a heinous tinkling that goeth in fits and starts, for that is unclean, and is an abomination. Whensoever a musician sticketh forth his foot as though he were afflicted with a cramp in the fatted calf, thou must complete the rest of that verse, and then cease.
V. Thou shalt stick out thine own foot or else lift up thy voice crying "This is it !", or "Last time !" if thou hast been the one to begin the song, and it has been played sufficient times over. If the one who began a tune endeth it not by one of these signs, then the tune will just go on and on, like the Old Testament, until the listeners say, "Hark ! It all soundeth the same."
VI. Thou shalt concentrate and thou shalt not confound the music by mixing up the A part and the B part. Most songs, but not all, proceedeth according to the ancient law "AABB". But if thou sinneth in this regard, or make any mistake that is unclean, thou may atone - not by ceasing to play - but by reentering the tune in the proper place and playing on.
VII. Thou shalt be ever mindful of the key the banjo is tuned in, and play many tunes in that key, for the banjo is but a lowly instrument, which must needs be retuned each time there is a key change.
VIII. Thou shalt not speed up or slow down accidentally when playing a tune, for it is an abomination. (See commandment I)
IX. Thou shalt not, by thine own self, commence noodling off on a tune the other musicians know not, unless asked or unless thou art teaching that tune, for it is an abomination, and the other musicians will not hold thee guiltless, and shall take thee off their computer lists, yea, even unto the third and the fourth generation.
X. Thou shalt have fun and play well.
IceCreamMan
i been guilty on all counts ?
vic
Thou should refrain from playing any instrument which emulates the sound of a noble instrument such as a pianola, violin, cello, sitar, brass instrument and drum. ?
singemonkey
Good stuff. I pretty much gave up jamming many years ago because I so hated the pointless round and rounds. But when everyone participates appropriately, I guess it can be pretty good.
Oh. The poor ol' banjo... ☹
DaFiz
I must confess that I too am a sinner in this regard... :-[
I thank thee for this enlightenment. ?
AlanRatcliffe
Thou shalt not bear false witness (glarething at the bass player when thou stuffeth up royally).
...and to quote that wise old sage, Ernest Ball: "Play accordion... go to jail".
vic
Thou shall never point a guitar at anyone and never encourage drummers to solo...and more than 2 pedals on thine board art the work of Lucifer.
Rattle not your tableware, nor strike it first against thy leg, then thy rib cage, all the while assuming the countenance of the stooge, for it is unclean and an abomination. Such apish behaviour is damnable for seven generations.
singemonkey
Alan Ratcliffe wrote:
...and to quote that wise old sage, Ernest Ball: "Play accordion... go to jail".
vic wrote:
Rattle not your tableware, nor strike it first against thy leg, then thy rib cage, all the while assuming the countenance of the stooge, for it is unclean and an abomination. Such apish behaviour is damnable for seven generations.
Why do you guys hate fun? ☹
vic
I like this one pertaining to country music....
All who perpetuate the country (and western) idiom, whether ye drag the bow, grasp the plectrum, thump the doghouse or tickle the five-string tambourine, assume not the stance of the constipated man, nor display false overbite. Playing country music is pleasurable, and to feign painful artistic reverie is unclean, and damnable.
Bob-Dubery
Alan Ratcliffe wrote:
Thou shalt not bear false witness (glarething at the bass player when thou stuffeth up royally).
...and to quote that wise old sage, Ernest Ball: "Play accordion... go to jail".
I prefer the words of John Hiatt
There oughta be a law with no bail
Smash a guitar and you go to jail
With no chance of early parole
You don't get out until you get some soul
CDee
Thou shalt not bring non-band members to such gatherings! >☹
arjunmenon
I think the XI th one should be, Thou must always remember to pack thy gear, lest it goes up in holy smoke or to the nearest pawn shop.
Bob-Dubery
Arjun Menon wrote:
I think the XI th one should be, Thou must always remember to pack thy gear, lest it goes up in holy smoke or to the nearest pawn shop.
...lest thy become known as "he who packs not away his gear" and thy name becomes a hiss and a by-word yea even until the 7th generation.
[deleted]
haha I love it! Send the banjo to play in the orchestra for Porgy and Bess though... Then it won't feel so lowly... ?
